Breaking Trail

Last weekend my husband and I went snowshoeing.  We have a bunch of lovely trails around our place that a few people use and maintain. The property owner doesn’t seem to mind as long as we are respectful.  Cool beans.

After about 20 minutes of snowshoeing, we came out on a road behind us, a little ways up.  My intention was to just turn around and go back the way we came because it’s easy.  My husband said, “That’s boring!  Let’s walk down the side of the road a bit and cut through the bush at the corner.  I’m pretty sure we’ll come out right at our place”. Sure! I’m up for an adventure. He said it was about a hundred yards (I’m metric so that means nothing to me) but that it should take about 10-15 minutes to get through. Okay! Let’s do this!

Our first step off the snow bank and into the bush had us thigh deep in snow.  Ooookay, we can do this.  My husband broke trail to start and I followed in his steps.  Now, I’m about 80 pounds lighter than he is, so following in his footsteps made it easier for me.  The hardest parts were the branches and trying to avoid getting poked in the eye or getting your snowshoe caught up in them and falling face first into the snow.

A couple of metres in (now we’re talking my language!) and about 15 minutes later, he was swearing and frustrated (but he’s a determined MF!) so I asked if he wanted me to break trail instead.  I think it helped a bit having me make the path, but he still sunk deeper than I did.  Needless to say, we both struggled, swore, were wet up to the crotch, had branches stuck in our hats and hair, and were a little winded.  We had to stop a few times to figure out the path of least resistance (i.e. less branches in our face and perhaps less deep snow).  It took us about an hour and 15 minutes but we came out right where he said we would – our back lot!. We did a little “woohoo”, he gloated a bit about being right, and then we went inside to put on dry, warm clothes.

I went back again the next day and packed down the trail. Now I have a much easier path to follow and can make a loop with the other trail we had done.  I did the loop today and it was really nice and took me just under and hour.

As we were breaking trail, I knew that I was going to use this experience as a metaphor for everything that happens in life.  Every time we do something new, we break trail.  Sometimes someone has gone before us and made it a bit easier.  But sometimes we are crotch deep with branches hanging from our hair and snow in our mitts from falling as we do it.

I think as we age, we are more inclined towards the path of least resistance.  We get comfortable in suburbia on our couches and the thought of making change, especially something that we aren’t sure what the trail is going to look like, can be daunting and down right scary.  Which is why my intention had been to go back the way we came.

Here are a few things I can take from this adventure and apply to real life.

1. There is always a path.

When we set out to do something new or different we have to remember there is always a path we can take. It might be back the way we came.  That’s okay.

Sometimes someone has gone before us and we have their steps we follow.  There may still be branches and some deep pockets of snow along the way but we have a guide.  That can feel a little more comfortable.  To me, it would be like if I was told I had to adopt a specialty diet.  I know I’m not the first one to do this.  There is information out there but it likely won’t be easy at first.  And if you think about it, most of the changes we try to make in life fit this type of trail.

Sometimes no one has gone before us – we are the trailblazers.  It may take us longer than expected because of the trees, branches, and deep snow.  Maybe we encounter a stream that we somehow have to cross or deal with other aspects of wild life.  We may need to enlist help.

I may not have decided to break that trail alone.  I’d want the support of someone else if I came across obstacles.  What if a encountered a wolf or a bobcat? I wouldn’t have worried about getting lost because I knew I could always go back the way I came. However, it can be easier to deal with the unexpected if you aren’t alone.

2. Sometimes snow gets deep.

I equate snow getting deep to shit getting real!  We may take those first few tentative steps and decide that this wasn’t what we signed up for.  Or maybe those first few steps indicate to us that we may need additional support such as a buddy, walking sticks, waterproof pants, or alpaca socks.

We may get halfway and really start to question if it’s worth continuing or if it’s time to cut our losses and head back the way we came.  That’s when we have to make some tough choices and consider our sunk costs.  Keep in mind, when we look back, things are often less hard than they seemed when we were in the thick of it.  When deciding to take the next step forward or go back (and maybe even just a few steps back to find a new path) we need to keep the end in mind.  Will it be worth it if I push through my comfort zone and come out the other side right where I wanted to be? Can I push through a different trail and still get the same or similar result (we may have had to break left because of a fallen tree and come out at our neighbour’s place)?

When snow gets deep, we may have to regroup and come up with a new plan.  We want to avoid snow higher than we can manage so we may need to consider breaking a different trail than expected.

3. Take it slow.

My husband said it would take 10-15 minutes but it took an hour and 15 minutes.  We encountered deeper snow and more brush than we expected.  We had to take it slow to get there safe and sound. Some of our footsteps were tentative if we weren’t sure how deep the snow was or what was under it.  We had to hold branches back for each other so we didn’t get slapped in the face with them.  We stopped to re-evaluate which way we wanted to go to, as I said, find the path of least resistance (or less chance of poked eyes).

When encountering change or something new, we have to expect that it will take us longer than we think it will. We have no frame of reference.  It’s all new.  It’s often more work than we anticipated.  I think of my clients who want to lose weight when I think of this point.  So many of them want to drop the weight quickly and get frustrated when it doesn’t happen and give up.  To lose weight safely and effectively, we need to take it slow, let our brain and our bodies adjust to change.

So many things in life require us to take it slow to get to the other side.  Plan to take it slow so you don’t get frustrated, disappointed or even angry.  Imagine how angry I would have been if I’d held on to that 15 minute time frame we initially thought it would take.  Enjoy the adventure. Savour the small victories.

4. Keep the end in sight.

We may take a wrong turn here and there.  We may have to take some steps backward to regroup and reassess the situation.  We may even have to turn back now because we weren’t ready or prepared and give it another go some other day.

But if it’s truly a trail we want to break, then we have to keep the end in sight.  That’s a great time to hire a coach.  They can look at the starting point and the end point and help you with all of the steps you need to take in between.  They can help you find the right snowshoes, walking sticks, waterproof gear, and safety glasses. They would be your GPS, which is probably a good investment if you decide you want to start breaking trail all over the bush.  You can be your own GPS by doing the research and preparation to break that trail yourself.  Like I said, most of the time someone has gone before us, we just have to find our guide.

5. Nothing beats getting there.

Think of all the the new things you’ve done in your life that were scary and intimidating when you started.  The best example is when we all learn to drive a car.  We are nervous, we check the mirrors and over our shoulder six times before we change lanes, we are afraid to go too fast… But the more we did it, the more comfortable we got.  We could finally turn the radio up because we weren’t concentrating so hard.  We could start to drink our tea and be okay with one hand on the wheel.  Now I’ve seen people eating a salad, drinking a coffee, checking their makeup and singing to the radio all while driving (I actually don’t recommend doing this; I didn’t feel particularly safe with this person driving near me.  But you get my point).

All of those new, scary things don’t feel that way anymore.  We may still have things that make us nervous like making a presentation or teaching a fitness class to other humans, but we know that if we are prepared we can do it; we’ve broken trail before and come out the other side.  The snow might get deep at times but we know we have the tools we are going to need.  Saying I need some help or different equipment is okay.

I went back through that trail twice the next day (there and back) so I went with an idea of what to expect.  It took 20 minutes the first time and I still got some branches in my hair and tripped a couple of times.  It took 15 minutes going back and I didn’t trip once! Trails get easier the more we take them.

6. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable.

While breaking that trail, I kept trying to find the path that had less branches in our way and trees to navigate through.  At one point my husband told me to stop veering left and just push through straight ahead. I told him I was trying to find the easier way through.  He said to just stay the course and push through, we’ll get there.  Of course, my answer was “Fine!”.  So, I pushed us through thicker brush and branches, fell a few times from tripping or deeper snow, and sure enough, five minutes later I literally stepped foot in our back lot.

As I said before, there is always a path.  If you really want to get to the right place, that path can make you uncomfortable.  We can delay and take the easier route and we may still get to the same place.  We can delay and take the easier route and not get quite the outcome we were looking for; and that might be good enough.  Sometimes we have to push through the branches and brush, the discomfort, the get where we want to be and it makes getting there that much sweeter.

That also reminded me that sometimes we have to heed the advice of others.  They can give us a different perspective or even big picture perspective because we are too close to the trees.  We also don’t know what we don’t know. He knew we were close.

I can tell you it felt so good to make it to our place. You know the feeling yourself from the trails you’ve broken.  It just sucked a tiny bit that my husband was right…